Not Yes

My kids are under the impression that my favorite word is "no".  I admit that I do use it a lot but it is hardly my favorite word.  I couldn't even begin to pick a favorite word.  Although I do have to thank Snoop Dogg for bringing "izzle" into my vocabulary...that's for rizzle, yo!

I would guess that I say no at least 30 times a day.  I also say, "maybe later," which is an implied no.  That bumps the total up to 40 times a day.  It's reported that a woman says 20,000 words a day on average, so forty expressions of no is hardly a drop in the bucket.  I could say it a lot more!

Now, don't get me wrong.  No is not a bad word, it's just not a good word.  Nobody likes to hear no because no is a drag.  Did you get that awesome promotion with a hefty pay raise yet?  No.  Are you going on that amazing free cruise around the world?  No.  Did you remember your keys before you locked the door?  Oh no!  

No can be a significant setback.  No can ruin your day.  No can even change your life.  

I've been talking to God lately about something that's very important to me.  I'd tell you about it, but is it your business?  No!  (Just kidding, but I'm still not going to tell you.)  Up until this point I've felt like he's been saying "maybe later".  When God says that I don't immediately assume the worst, I just try to be patient.  But lately I feel like he may be preparing my heart to hear no.  

When I say no, it usually means no.  Certain small people in my life tend to think that whining will magically transform my no into a yes... those certain people are wrong.  But when God says no, there really isn't any sense in arguing.  After all, God knows best.  Nevertheless, it's still hard to hear... especially when God says it.

When God says no, it hurts.  It's like he's saying, "no, and that's final," even when he's says it gently.  

When I hear no, I too think that whining will be effective.  I fuss and fight with God, insisting that he should change his mind.  Surely I know what's best for my life.  He just needs to trust me!  I try to circumvent God and find my yes elsewhere.  I have even ignored his no at times.  

But when I think of God and his infinite wisdom, when I consider his track record in my own life... his aptly spoken "no" has proven itself to be invaluable.  When I was an infant and nearly died due a heart defect, God said no.  When pain over the loss of my dad threatened to destroy my hope, God said no.  When I thought my unborn baby was dead, God said no.  On the day when Satan fought for the possession of my soul, God said no.  

Do I have any better reason to trust God with every detail of my life?  No.